random rants

Ang galing talaga ni God, super!

Just want you to share what I just read a few minutes ago..
"the church focuses, generally, on issues like 'how to gain a good self-image' or 'how to be more effective in prayer' than it does to know God"
tama naman db?
masyado tayong nakatingin sa numbers, sa material things, when we should be concentrating on God and God alone. Takot tayo sa sasabihin ng iba, sa opinyon ng tao pero sa ang opinyon ni God ang nasasakripisyo...

strangers are angels

i have never been fond of talking to strangers... (yun bang.. ikaw yung unang makikipag-usap sa isang taong right then and there mo lang nakita/nakilala)

first, suplada lang talaga ako (i am sure a lot of you won't believe it, but yes.. i am suplada!)
second, hindi ko lang talaga feel na makipag-usap sa isang taong totally unknown to me - parang ang weird na bigla na lang ikaw feeling close sa someone na you've just meet, say, 2-3 minutes ago.

but God spoke to me in a different way...

umalis kami nina nessa para mag-take out sa mcdo - not knowing that God will speak to me in a manner that'll make me grin until now - so ayun nga.. we went out, shempre, yung guy (whoever he is) was with his manager at that time. nung tatanungin na ng crew kung ano ang order ko (umupo na si Nessa at Nano nung time na yun), the manager told me, "Db ma'am kaibigan ka ni Miss Judy?" flustered, i told her, "ah yung manager every morning? Ah, oo.. kilala ko siya." And then the manager began telling the cashier guy na regular customer daw ako sa mcdo and so on...

so i was there and he was there, in between giving my order, the guy was asking things about me - like where i live, how old i am and also making comments how nice my smile is, whether i am married or if i have a boyfriend... yung mga ganung too weirdong mga tanong.

well, the questions and comments where somewhat personal but at that time, i was 'drinking it all in'...

weeks (probably months ago), i've been having a pity-party of my own - na pakiramdam ko, napakapangit ko and that i am worthless and that i am just a piece of trash. i have been struggling with these thoughts and feelings - na wala nang magmamahal sa akin, na wala akong kwentang tao because people that i care and love always leave me - intentionally or unintentionally.... i've grown so numb that even praises from close friends didn't even matter...

and this guy - who was simply taking my order while telling me how cute my smile is - this guy who by just looking at me made me feel very uncomfortable (in a nice, yet uncomfortable way), made me feel special... :)

then it hit me - naalala ko yung love ni Lord, naalala ko yung love ng papa ko, naalala ko yung love ng mga kapatid ko, naalala ko yung love ng mga friends ko... it's as if *boom* nawala lahat (if not, almost) yung painful feeling of being alone and left out.

AMAZING...

God, in all His majesty, used that less-than-five-minute conversation with a stranger.. He used that moment to 'say' to me that i am feel special and loved. GRABE talaga si Lord. Na-touch ako with the thought na, sa dami ng "inaasikaso" Niya sa mundo, he took time para i-address yung mga needs, hurts, wants and desires ko.

like me,
Paul (formerly known as Saul) had a five-minute-miracle with God at Damascus...
Moses had a five-minute-miracle near the burning bush
Hagar had a five-minute-miracle at the well (Mary Magdalene too!)
Mary had a five-minute-miracle while being informed that she'd be the mother of the Savior
the guy with Jesus on the cross had a five-minute-miracle with Jesus himself when He told him that at that very moment he will be with Jesus in heaven
and a lot more Biblical characters, who were saved, healed and delivered from evil, had a five-minute-miracle from God.

ang galeng ano?
ikaw,
have you had a five-minute-miracle of your own?
share mo naman!

money matters

i joined our team's "paluwagan" and i was really anticipating the day i get my 'sweldo'.

it's not too much but the promise of getting a large sum of money is really exciting! imagine, i get to buy the stuff that i REALLY want. the day drew near - but the euphoria was spoiled by the fact that our account is having some 'problems' and the client wants to 'lower the cost' - which means lowering down the number of people...

the excitement gone, i just went to buy gifts for my inaanaks and friends (which turned out pretty well), but only to find out that almost all of it - gone with the wind!

i have discussed this with a colleague, and we both agreed na ambilis mawala ng pera.

kaya hindi talaga dapat ilagay ang tiwala sa pera - o sa kahit anong bagay o sa kahit sinong tao sa mundo.

kasi, madali silang nawawala.

buti si God, hindi.

i have learned that...

today was a very sad day for me and the whole team i am working with. unexpectedly, we had people who got terminated simply because the "upper-level" said so.

it is unfair. and unprofessional.

there were things i have learned:

1. that you can never trust people, more so the company you are working with, simply because NOTHING and NO ONE IS STABLE. time and time again, i have been reminded of the saying that "Change is the only thing that's constant in this world"

2. that i need not to worry because it will not help me in any way. God simply said to let tomorrow worry for itself...

3. that sincerity works best in silence. whatever words that come out of one's mouth, if not from the heart, you won't feel anything.

4. that people should be cherished, loved and respected the earliest possible time.

5. that you need not wait for the perfect opportunity to say nice things about a person, because that time may never come and it's too late for you to let them know.

6. that the more you know a person, the harder it is to let them go..

7. that good people turns bad... (in situations like this)

8. that most companies think more of money that good and hardworking people that work for them.

9. that no matter how you perform well, it's not enough to satisfy them. all they want you to do and think about is work, work, and work... and if they do not want you, they simply throw you away...

10. that a team won't be the same without Joanne, Vane, Arlene, Jocee, Joel, Bryan, Ian, and Naw. it will never be.

11. that this is not the end...

my heart's desire

Lord,these are my desires - my heart's desires... and i lay them all to you

- maging maayos ang pamilya (spiritually)
- makapagaral na si Jamie at makatapos na siya ng pag-aaral
- magkaroon ng maayos na trabaho si ate
- maayos ang mga gamit sa church
- magkaroon ng YA fellowship sa church (regular) na intimate ang worship ang fellowship with You
- maayos ang mga Hallelujah Kids, na sana wag nilang lagyan ng kulay ang fellowship ng mga bata sa kung anuman na pulitikal na dahilan
- magkaroon ng ka-interfelowship na YA sa AG at buong Pasig
- magkaroon ng laptop
- magkaroon ng bike
- magkaroon ng sariling bahay
- makilala ko na ang God's will ko next year (kasi Lord, gusto ko na po talagang magkapamilya!)

NOT MY WILL, BUT YOUR WILL PO ANG MASUNOD.
amen

no longer a memory

yesterday morning (oct 26) i was having doubts kung tutuloy pa ba ako sa master's commission -- medyo makulimlim kasi (alam mo yun, mas masarap mahiga at manood ng dvd or makinig ng gospel music)... but in all honesty, tinatamad ako. tsaka, nag-iisa lang ako. tapos, wala na talaga akong pera - yung huling P1,000 na lang na naipon ko ang gagastusin ko hanggang sa susunod na sweldo.

pero hindi ko maintindihan - may kurot akong nararamdaman, mahinang kurot pero alam mong "holy kurot"....

let me tell you the story behind the story...

i think it was 2000, or 1999 perhaps when God allowed me to witness a ministry that forever changed my life. that was the first Blueprints Conference, held in BBC when God "introduced" me to this young talented and on-fire Christians (much, much younger than me) dancing under the powerful annointing of the Holy Spirit. Yes, they REALLY have talents (and Praise God for that), but most importantly, the Spirit of the Lord was dwelling in them - ang galing! bawat kumpas ng kamay, bawat bagsak ng paa, bawat ekspresyon sa mukha, ibang klase. ibang-ibang-iba ang pakiramdam ko nun. i know, God was telling me something.

from then on, i decided, kailangang maging part ako ng master's commission. kailangan na makasali ako sa kahit isa sa mga workshops nila at maging part ng isang batch.

but you know what? it never happened. i've meet Christians, who became part of the MC workshops (we even borrowed tapes from them para gawin namin sa church), my cousin who is a missionary in X was also trained by MC, last year duon pa sa church natulog ang ilang grupo ng MC-Olongapo (pero hindi ko alam na me workshop pala!) and that very same event, kasama kami ng mga 'newly graduates' ng MC na magstep-call sa isang daughter church namin (mismo!)

i asked the Lord, "kailan ba darating ang time ko?"

and now this - merong opportunity. the sunday before the workshop, our associate pastor told me na meron daw workshop. FINALLY! the moment i have been waiting for!

tapos, the very morning ng 'conference' bigla akong tinamad. BUT OUR GOD IS A GOD OF PURPOSE. alam kong Siya ang dahilan kaya ako naging part ng 2-day conference na ito.

BLESSED...

then i heard a story of a brother (whom i do not know personally but will forever challenge me) a 16-year old kid named Christian Marasigan who died because of a seemingly innocent accident. his story reminded me of how little time i have... and his story stirred up an overwhelming wake up call. his death proves that compared to eternity, our life here on earth is but short.

BLESSED...

then there's the lesson of the ants - how these little creatures inspired a movement that is shaking and will shake nations... "MISSION SWARMING"

BLESSED...

a revelation of how much we owe our Muslim brothers - an enlightenment... that more to what the news tells about them (labelling them as terrorists, etc), that they are our brothers whom God has blessed, and will bless,

BLESSED...

that more to becoming a part of a team, is becoming a part of an extended family - unseen yet heard of.

BLESSED...
because more to knowing Christ, more to making Him known
is a realization that i am here and i can make a diffence.

amen

50 things you oughta know

1] Whats your middle name?
:: Hernandez

[2] Would you rather get 1,12 or 24
roses? -
:: kahit isa lang basta kulay....

[ 3] How big is your bed? -
:: don't have any

[4] What are you listening to right
now?
:: don't know the song,

[5] What are the last 4 digits in your
cell phone number?
:: 1443

6] What was the last thing you ate? -
:: hotdog at tinapay!

[7] Last person you hugged? -
:: nano

[8] How is the weather right now? -
:: umuulan

[9] Who was the last person you talked
to on the phone? -
:: si Ellarick

[10] What is the first thing you notice
in the opposite sex? -
:: mata, then kuko sa kamay

[11] Favorite types of Food? -
:: Pinoy and Japanese

[12] Do you want children? -
:: naman!

[13] Do you drink? -
:: nope. but sometimes, i want to...

[14 ] Ever get so drunk you don't
remember the entire night? -
:: nope

[ 15] Hair color? -
:: dk brown

[16] Eye color? -
:: dk brown

[17] Do you wear contacts/glasses? -
:: eyeglasses

[18] Favorite holiday? -
:: christmas

[19 ] Favorite season? -
:: rainy season

[20] Have you ever cried over a
girl/boy? -
:: naman!

[21] Last Movie you Watched? -
:: mona lisa

[2 2] What books are you reading? -
:: boy meets girl (ulet)

[23] Piercings? -
:: none

[24] Favorite Movie? -
:: nuknukan ng dami!

[25] Favorite college football Team? -
:: wala

[26] What were you doing before filling
this out? -
:: naglalaba, naglilinis

[27] Any pets?
:: none

[2 8] Dogs or cats? -
:: na

[29] Favorite Flower? -
:: rose?

[30] Have you ever loved someone? -
:: of course.

[31] Who would you like to see right
now? -
:: tatay ko. gusto kong makipagkwentuhan sa kaniya

[33] Do you like to travel by train? -
:: depends

[34] Right-handed or Left-handed? -
:: right

[35] If you could go to any place right
now where would you go? -
:: puerto (ulet) or... Europe (sana)

36] Are you missing someone? -
:: naman!

[37] Do you have a tattoo? -
:: no

[38] Do you still watch cartoons on
Saturday mornings? -
:: not during Saturdays, pag me extra time.

[39] Are you hiding something from
someone? -
:: ewan

[41] what is the wallpaper on your cell
phone? -
:: yung sunrise sa ayala

[42] did you get enough sleep last
night? -
:: of course HINDI!

[44] What do you have handy at your
bedside? -
:: wala...

[45] What makes you unique? -
:: what do you think?

[46 ] Are you afraid of the dark? -
:: minsan...

[ 47 ] Favorite song? -
:: Katinas' songs, parachute band, hillsongs...

[48] What are you afraid of? -
:: tumanda nang mag-isa?

[49 ] Are you a giver or taker? -
:: pareho.

[50] what are your nicknames? -
:: kris, tyn, tyn-tyn, kenkai, kenx (kenks), kai,

random rants

God is definitely good and He is infinitely great!

just a few hours ago, my mind was oozing with ideas and thoughts... now, it's blank.
grrrr... have you experienced this knd of feeling? parang andami-dami mong gustong sabihin, tapos kapag nakaharap ka na sa computer (or perhaps sa taong kakausapin mo, or anything with that kind of nature) biglang "poof" wala lahat yung cool ideas. b-l-a-n-k-o!

this always happens to me - i need to make use of my time wisely and efficiently. si Jesus nga, He spent every moment of His stay on earth worthwhile tapos ako, magpro-procastinate lang.

anyway, i do not know what to write as of this very moment. to be honest i have been thinking of this person the whole night - paano ba naman nagtext kagabi kasi that person found out (from whoever) na nagkasakit ako - but i don't think that writing about that person here would help me...

i am thinking about the upcoming YA 'seminar' this November. i REALLY want to go - pero may apprehension. i have issues regarding my emotions as of the moment - selos, disappointed kasi nag-resign, disappointed kasi nag-offer ka na ng adobo dinedma lang - andami! bahala KA na Lord.

i am praying for kuya Mike. Na patuloy silang i-bless ni God.

i have been reading joshua harris' web, (www.joshuaharris.com) and man, ang cute ng family niya! As in! parang buhay na buhay tuloy yung mga books niyang binabasa ko!


i am logging out. i am going to look for some info regarding parachute band

something valuable

this week taught me something very valuable. I have learned that i need to take things one day at a time.

i was exhausted. for four-straight days, my average sleep only lasts 2-3 hours. i had no time to pray, no time to relax, no time for myself. i "worked" too hard....

the following week - it hit me. i was sick for four days. I WAS PHYSICALLY WASTED.

i think the most important thing that i should take note of what happened is learning learning how to balance my time wisely.

some info about me...

. Your name plus "ly"?
- JABSON-LY

2.Two feelings at the moment?
- tired but happy (also wasted?

3. What are you listening to right now?
- yung tunog ng keyboard...

4. Done anything you regret so far this
week?
- wala pa naman

5. Describe where you are right now?
- maraming computers, onti ng tao

6.The highlight of your week?
- process meeting was a smash, church anniv tomorrow

7. What are you craving to have right
now?
- mangga't bagong

8. Who were the last people you ate
with?
- the kids

9. What are you scared of?
- magalit si Lord sa akin..

10. Last movie you watched?
- sa dvd, nde movie eh "couple or trouble"

11. Last song you sang out loud?
- make me a servant

13. Are you thinking of someone right
now?
- yes

14. Who is the last person you talked
to?
- yung taga-rito sa computer shop

15. Last thing you downloaded on your
computer?
- wala

16. Have you changed much this year?
- siguro (?)

19. Hug or kiss
- warm embrace

23. Who was the last person to text
you?
- tristan

24. Where was the last place you went
besides where you are?
- church

25. Has anyone ever said you looked
like a celeb?
- yep... kamukha ko raw si Angelina Jolie!

26. Do you speak any other language
other than english?
- nope, but i want to learn

27 . watched TV?
- yes, of course

28. Do you dress for style or comfort?
- COMFORT.

tired but happy

i have been deprived of sleep for the last three days...
malabo na nga ang tingin ko sa computer screen while i am writing this entry..

but i wanted to share something.

GOD IS WONDERFUL.
JESUS IS BEAUTIFUL.

i am so touched with the song, "Beautiful"
simple, yet it satisfies the reality that only He can make beautiful things in my life.

To others, life may seem unfair, and cruel at its worst.
But God never said that it'll be easy.
It is a comfort that He is alive and that He is always there.

I am not a perfect person...
nor a strong one (well, i really thought i was a toughie before)
but when Jesus found me
He gave my life a purpose.

I can stand not because I am stong,
I can speak out not because I am wise,
I can buy things not because I am rich,
but it is ALL because of His grace.

I praise You Jesus...
not because of the great things You did for me
but because of who You are.

I laugh because of You
I sing because of You
I teach because of You
I love because of You

I live because of You.

Hope this entry will be an inspiration for you and for myself when I feel down.
Amen

>x((((("> credo <")))))x<

ayokong dumating sa punto na maging routine na lang ang lahat ng gawain ko sa buhay,
ayokong patuloy na lang umagos sa takbo ng mundo...

gusto ko ng isang buhay na well-spent.
gusto ko na ang bawat minuto - bawat segundo ng aking hininga ay makabuluhan - buhay.

hindi ko inaasahan na sa gagawin kong ito - magiging matagumpay ako.
hindi sa lahat ng pagkaataon ako ang nagwawagi.

pero alam ko na sa biyaya ng Dios, kaya ako makakatayo
at magpapatuloy.

iiwanan ko na ang nakaraan.
iiwanan ko na ang mga alaalang hindi naman makakatulong sa aking pagharap sa buhay.
iiwanan ko na rin ang mga pangarap na hindi naman karapat-dapat.

magpapatuloy akong
manampalataya at magtiwala
magmahal at umibig
magsaya at lumuha

LOVE LIKE YOU'VE NEVER BEEN BROKEN

august entry

this is my first-ever entry for the month of August... (grabe!)
lately kasi, lagi akong nagmamadali na gumawa ng church program - no time to write here.

Lord, sana naman po ay ibigay Mo na sa akin ang hinihiling kong laptop....

Hindi pa ako natutulog mula nang umuwi ako galing work. Napapagod na ako. Minsan (actually, lately, madalas) gusto ko nang sumuko. Nakakapagod na kasi. Ayaw ko namang mag-reklamo, pero nahihirapan na ako. Iniisip ko lang, kapag sumuko ako, maraming tao ang umaasa sa akin. Siguro, kaya binigay sa akin ni God si nano para hindi maging wayward ang klase ng pamumuhay ko. Ok na rin 'yung ganito. Aalis na lang ako sa 'sitwasyon' na ito kapag sinabi na ni God sa akin. Anyway, kaya naman ako nabubuhay dahil sa Kaniya.

Kahapon, nanaginip ako ng 2 panaginip.

(1) Ang setting ay Korea, marunong daw akong mag-Korean (naks!) tapos ang naalala kong ending, pupunta ako sa isang lugar tapos yung lugar na yun may 'story' behind the name. Nanggaling daw yung name nung lugar na yon sa isang 'napakagandang bulaklak'. Although maganda yung bulaklak na yun, meron daw 2 smaller (and of course, mas pangit) na flowers ang nagsasabi/nag-uutos sa kaniya kung paano niya po-protektahan yung sarili niya. After some time, meron daw 2 kids na binunot yung magandang bulaklak. Pinulot daw ng isang lalaki yung bulaklak tapos inilagaan....

when i woke up, i received a message from someone i know- message was "hus dis?"

(2) Nagugutom daw ako and I ended up in a cafeteria - pero hindi ako nakakain kasi merong mga girls na sobrang bully. Yung cafeteria owner happens to be a taxi driver too and since male-late ako pagpasok, sumakay na ako sa taxi niya. And weird part, nakahiga raw ako sa taxi, and to make the long story short, the driver attempted to rape me (which until now gives me goosebumps!), mind you, habang nasa biyahe ito ha! nasira ko raw yung taxi, nakalabas ako tapos raw yung kasunod na car happens to be driven by a policeman. Pinasakay ako nung policeman. Out of nowhere, comes another guy na tinulungan ako (can't remember kung papaano) tapos sumakay din sa car nung policeman. Tinakluban ako ng puting kumot nung guy kasi, hinahabol daw ako ng tingin nung driver. nasa likod ako nung lalaki, him facing the taxi driver - tinatago niya ako from the driver...

weird hindi ba?

ANYWAY, lalayas na ako rito.

-mapapa-print pa ako ng program

-maglilinis pa ako ng church

-bibili pa ako ng bombilya at ikakabit ko pa

-papakainin ko pa si nano

-maglalaba pa ako

-maghuhugas ng pinggan

-magtuturo ng mga bata

at maraming pang iba!

WALANG TUUUULLLUUUGGGAAAANNNNN!!!!

.: random rants:.

namimiss ko pa rin si rogie. ang laki talaga nang nawala sa buhay ko. but i have finally realized na "wala na nga talaga" .. based sa mga pinapakita niya sa akin at ugali niya towards sa akin, pati sa mga pananalita niya sa akin kapag kaming dalawa lang ang nag-uusap - ibang-iba na talaga. ayoko lang ng ganito ako, maraming pagkakataon kasi sa buhay ko na 'hopeful' pa rin ako na babalik siya sa akin, but it seems na hindi ganun ang mangyayari - ever.

ipokrita ako kung sasabihin kong ok lang, kasi hindi naman talaga OK. pero, wala naman na talaga akong magagawa. (eto yung 'worst' part nun - yung wala akong magawa.)

gusto kong magsulat ng marami pero nagugutom ako.
grabe, as in.
(kakain muna ako)

kristiyano o Kristiyano?

minsan, nahihirapan akong ipagmalaki na Kristiyano ako.
paano ba naman, marami akong ugaling "basag" gaya ng sobrang mainitin ang ulo, kulang sa pasensiya, at walang self control (lalo na kapag nagagalit)... kaya nagiging questionable si Christ sa buhay ko...

gusto kong isisi sa iba kung bakit ako nagkakaganito - kasi iniwanan nila ako, hindi nila ako mahal, o kung mahal man eh hindi naman nila ipinapakita o ipinapadama sa akina ang pagmamahal na iyon, at maraming-marami pang puwedeng maging dahilan - pero lahat ng ito ay isisisi ko pa rin sa aking sarili.

napakadali naman kasing sabihin ng mga "nagmamagaling" na tingnan mo ang mga bagay na mayroon ka -- na kung hindi man naibibigay ng isang partikular na 'grupo' ng tao ang pagmamahal at atensiyon na hinahanap mo, at least meron pa namang ibang grupo na nagpaparamdam ng suporta at pang-unawa nila sa iyo. madali LANG sabihin na andiyan naman si God na hindi nang-iwan kahit kailan lalo na kapag nag-iisa ka.... pero ang totoo, naghahanap ka ng actuwal na atensiyon - hindi theoretical.

ang gulu-gulo ng pakiramdam ko ngayon. parang kanina lang, i had a great time during the children's party tapos ngayon, basag na basag ang pakiramdam ko. pakiramdam ko, araw-araw na lang sinusubok ang pasensiya ko, para akong gini-grill at tine-test, na lagi akong nag-uundergo ng persecution - haaaaaayyyy....

tapos, makakarinig ka pa ng 'comment' sa isang taong mas masahol pa ang pag-uugali sa iyo - na para bang siya ay napakagalang sa kaniyang ama eh kapag Sunday nga ng umaga, ni hindi man lang pagbuksan ng pintuan.

naiinis ako.
hindi ko maipagtanggol ang sarili ko.

naiinis ako kasi
wala na akong peace sa buhay ko.

naiinis ako
kasi lagi na lang akong iniiwanan.

naiinis ako
...kasi wala akong magawa para mabago ang takbo ng buhay ko.
...kasi mahina ang pananampalataya ko
...kasi hindi ko maipadama sa Kaniya na mahal ko Siya
...kasi hindi ako maka-let go sa bitterness na meron ako ngayon
...kasi hindi ko nagawa ang pinakamainam ko sa kaniya during our relationship

naiinis ako

tulungan ninyo ako.
kailangan ko ng tulong...

the morning he said he'll never come back to me, i broke down. it's as if i lost an integral part of my life (which is actually true) - i lost my life's other half. i cried so hard, i fervently prayed and honestly opened myself to Him. i told Him, "i don't know what to do without him," that "i'll be a better person just give me one more chance (once LAST chance) with him and so on - i tried to bargain with God, because He is the only One who could make a difference. After hours of what seem to be eternity, i finally stopped crying and let Him soothe me. Memories came to me - it's as if I'm watching my life from a third person's view. those were memories of what i used to be when i was so much involved serving Him... those were the days when nothing else mattered to me but make Him happy.

it dawned to me. He was never the center of our relationship - it's as if He's merely an audience. and deep in my heart, i know that God never meant relationships to be that way - because He wants to be an active participant in our daily lives, day and night. that's why it happened. that's why we ended up parting ways.

i never imagined things to end this way (who would have, anyway) but i guess there's a bigger picture that i need to see - more than just the two of us.

this does not mean that life is better off without him.

this does not mean that the year we have spent together will be forgotten - because he is a person you cannot easily forget, and besides, i don't want to forget. it's just that life would never be the same without him.

while i am writing this, i want him back. but i know i can't , because he does not want to - anymore.

so i am back to the drawing board again -

all i have is a jar full of messages

a song left unheard

and a silent prayer that someday, somehow our love will bring us back together.

pray for me.

first & last

Your FIRST name:
- kristyn grace

FIRST thing na ginawa mo nang magising:
- tumulala

FIRST thing na inisip mo nang magising:
- "ayaw kong pumasok Lord"

FIRST na tao na inisip mo pagkagising:
- si rogie

FIRST na sinabi mo nang magising ka:
- "haaaayyyy"

FIRST song na narinig mo ng magising
ka:
- wala

FIRST na hinawakan mo nang magising ka:
- cellphone? hindi ko na maalala

FIRST thing na tinitingnan mo sa
guy/girl:
- mata at balikat

FIRST thing na hinahanap mo sa
guy/girl:
- may sense kausap

FIRST thing na nakakaturn-off para
sayo
sa guy/girl:
- maruming kuko

FIRST thing na gusto mo sa isang tao:
- masayahin

FIRST thing na ayaw mo sa isang tao:
- masyado maarte

FIRST thing na gusto mo sa sarili mo:
- kahit ano..

FIRST thing na ayaw mo sa sarili mo:
- pikon tsaka laging mainit ang ulo

FIRST time na nakausap mo crush mo:
- grade one?

BEST movie you watched:
- cinderella story and 50 first dates

LAST tv show you watched:
- 24 oras?

LAST song you heard:
- i'll be over you

LAST thing you bought:
- pagkain

LAST food you ate:
- tokyo-tokyo barkada meal A

LAST na ginawa mo d time u went out:
- kumain lang sa tokyo-tokyo kasi nag-hang ang ATM, nawala LAHAT ng pera ko!

LAST thing you said to yourself:
- miss mo siya kahit ayaw mong aminin

LAST person who chat u:
- yung girl sa Equitable call center, kim ata name nun.

LAST person na nakaaway mo:
- rogie

LAST alcoholic beverage you had:
- san mig light

LAST thing you'll do before sleeping
tonight:
- pray

Last letter of ur FULL name?
-n


Last thing u drank?
- water

Last song you listened to?
- ewan ko, hindi ko alam ang title ng pinatutugtog nila dito sa computer shop

Last thing u did? (before
answering this survey)
- nag-blog ng konti about my ATM mishap

Last movie you watched?
- hindi movie pero HANA YORI DANGO!!!!

Last time you cleaned your room?
- kahapon, i'll do it again later

Last CD/Cassette you bought?
- bossa

Last time you cried?
- kanina lang

Last person u added to ur
friendster list?
- di ko na matandaan.

Last website you browsed?
- yahoo.com

Last person u were thinking?(before
answering thiiz)
- ro ROGIE GOPEZ LADDRAN

Last time u felt sick?
- earlier when I got home..

Last 2 digits of ur home phone?
- 43

Last place you went to?
- Megamall

Last book u read?
- the Leadership of Jesus

Last person u adored?
- adored? ano ito? inalayan ng bulaklak???

Last person u bought a present for?
- si rogie ata.

Last person u said happy birthday
to?
- casey & Brian via LN

Last person who made you smile?
- si rogie - kasama ko siya kanina ..
natuwa ako sa kaniya...

ATM encounter

Lord,

why me?

sa lahat naman po ng mati-tiyempuhan na mag-hang ang ATM - ako pa...

ewan ko kung blessing in disguise, or talaga lang na he's my knight in shining armour ... prior kami magpunta ng mall... niloloko ko si nessa na tawagan namin si rogie para kasama naming magpunta ng mall - pero nag-back out ako kasi, wala naman ding logical na dahilan (kasi gusto ko siyang makasama)

tapos, because of that emergency - siya agad ang una kong naisipan na tawagan. Nessa was suggesting to call a lot of people - but I ended up dialing his number...

yun lang.

.:one word:.

1. Where is your cell phone?* church
2. Your boyfriend/girlfriend?* huh?
3. Your hair?* curly
4. your mother?* MIA
5. Your father?* heaven
6. Your favorite thing?* books
7. Your dream last night* (???)
8. Your favorite drink?* coke
9. Your dream car?* rav4!
10. The room you're in?* (room??)
11. Your sisters?* cool
12. Your fear/s?*
13. What do you want to be in 10 years?* happy
14. Who did you hang out withlastnight?* churchmates
15. What you're not good at?* patience
16. What/who do you hate?*
17. One of your wish list items?* LAPTOP!
19. The last thing you did?* sang
20. What are you wearing?* blouse (!!!)
21. what aren't you wearing?* earrings
22. Your pet?* none
23. Your computer?* none
24. Your life?* happy
25. Your mood?* numb
26. Missing?* him
27. What are you thinking about right now?* church
28. Your work?* astig
29. Your summer?* galera!
30. Your relationship status?* duh?
31. Your favorite?* reading
32. When is the last time you laughed?* last night
33. Last time you cried hard?* friday

new blog, new beginning

i have been meaning to create a new blogspot... not because i wanted to "forget" who i have become, but the posts in my previous blogspot led to so many arguments with the one we now call "ex", that ended up in creating a new one.

i wanted to retain my old "weirdkenx" name, but it seems inappropriate. i am not weird anyway, mostly misunderstood. hehehe. so, "kenkai12" is born....

why "kenkai12"?

for those who does not know (and does not care, either)

"kenkai" was my nickname when I was in college (well, one of the many - kenx, kenki, zenki, and yes, pukenx!)...i distinctively remember how i got that name - we were having this "ice breaker" activity during one of our pre-college seminars, the moderator (whatever the 'leader' is called) asked us to introduce ourselves by creating an adjective using the first letter of our name and act it out. I used "kenkoy kristyn" and marvyn gaerlan (his was "magical"), said "eh girl ka, it should be kenkai"... And the rest, they say, is history...

"12" is the day when i was born (january 12) and for some reason, i like the number "12". that's probably one of the reasons why i like the movie "Cheaper By the Dozen". basta, there is something mysterious that draws me near to number 12... (mystical music)

well, so life goes on. college friends and acquiantances call me "kenkai" (even my PUP 'friends'!) ... ironically, during our graduation, some of my friends were looking at the graduation list, they were all wondering who the heck was "KRISTYN GRACE H. JABSON" ... they were surprised when i said it was me - after all, they REALLY thought i was legally born "KENKAI JABSON" (heheheh) ....

SO THIS IS IT.

a new life

a new beginning

a new blogspot

a new online 'diary'.

this is where i vent, i curse, i dream dreams and build dreams...

this is where i'll share my hurts and pains, the smiles and tears...

this is where i make fun of myselfand others (well, hopefully not too much)

this is where i build my castle...

this is my 'home'

i hope you (the one reading this) not only enjoy what i write here but find strength amidst my chaotic life.

thanks and have fun!