no longer a memory

yesterday morning (oct 26) i was having doubts kung tutuloy pa ba ako sa master's commission -- medyo makulimlim kasi (alam mo yun, mas masarap mahiga at manood ng dvd or makinig ng gospel music)... but in all honesty, tinatamad ako. tsaka, nag-iisa lang ako. tapos, wala na talaga akong pera - yung huling P1,000 na lang na naipon ko ang gagastusin ko hanggang sa susunod na sweldo.

pero hindi ko maintindihan - may kurot akong nararamdaman, mahinang kurot pero alam mong "holy kurot"....

let me tell you the story behind the story...

i think it was 2000, or 1999 perhaps when God allowed me to witness a ministry that forever changed my life. that was the first Blueprints Conference, held in BBC when God "introduced" me to this young talented and on-fire Christians (much, much younger than me) dancing under the powerful annointing of the Holy Spirit. Yes, they REALLY have talents (and Praise God for that), but most importantly, the Spirit of the Lord was dwelling in them - ang galing! bawat kumpas ng kamay, bawat bagsak ng paa, bawat ekspresyon sa mukha, ibang klase. ibang-ibang-iba ang pakiramdam ko nun. i know, God was telling me something.

from then on, i decided, kailangang maging part ako ng master's commission. kailangan na makasali ako sa kahit isa sa mga workshops nila at maging part ng isang batch.

but you know what? it never happened. i've meet Christians, who became part of the MC workshops (we even borrowed tapes from them para gawin namin sa church), my cousin who is a missionary in X was also trained by MC, last year duon pa sa church natulog ang ilang grupo ng MC-Olongapo (pero hindi ko alam na me workshop pala!) and that very same event, kasama kami ng mga 'newly graduates' ng MC na magstep-call sa isang daughter church namin (mismo!)

i asked the Lord, "kailan ba darating ang time ko?"

and now this - merong opportunity. the sunday before the workshop, our associate pastor told me na meron daw workshop. FINALLY! the moment i have been waiting for!

tapos, the very morning ng 'conference' bigla akong tinamad. BUT OUR GOD IS A GOD OF PURPOSE. alam kong Siya ang dahilan kaya ako naging part ng 2-day conference na ito.

BLESSED...

then i heard a story of a brother (whom i do not know personally but will forever challenge me) a 16-year old kid named Christian Marasigan who died because of a seemingly innocent accident. his story reminded me of how little time i have... and his story stirred up an overwhelming wake up call. his death proves that compared to eternity, our life here on earth is but short.

BLESSED...

then there's the lesson of the ants - how these little creatures inspired a movement that is shaking and will shake nations... "MISSION SWARMING"

BLESSED...

a revelation of how much we owe our Muslim brothers - an enlightenment... that more to what the news tells about them (labelling them as terrorists, etc), that they are our brothers whom God has blessed, and will bless,

BLESSED...

that more to becoming a part of a team, is becoming a part of an extended family - unseen yet heard of.

BLESSED...
because more to knowing Christ, more to making Him known
is a realization that i am here and i can make a diffence.

amen

50 things you oughta know

1] Whats your middle name?
:: Hernandez

[2] Would you rather get 1,12 or 24
roses? -
:: kahit isa lang basta kulay....

[ 3] How big is your bed? -
:: don't have any

[4] What are you listening to right
now?
:: don't know the song,

[5] What are the last 4 digits in your
cell phone number?
:: 1443

6] What was the last thing you ate? -
:: hotdog at tinapay!

[7] Last person you hugged? -
:: nano

[8] How is the weather right now? -
:: umuulan

[9] Who was the last person you talked
to on the phone? -
:: si Ellarick

[10] What is the first thing you notice
in the opposite sex? -
:: mata, then kuko sa kamay

[11] Favorite types of Food? -
:: Pinoy and Japanese

[12] Do you want children? -
:: naman!

[13] Do you drink? -
:: nope. but sometimes, i want to...

[14 ] Ever get so drunk you don't
remember the entire night? -
:: nope

[ 15] Hair color? -
:: dk brown

[16] Eye color? -
:: dk brown

[17] Do you wear contacts/glasses? -
:: eyeglasses

[18] Favorite holiday? -
:: christmas

[19 ] Favorite season? -
:: rainy season

[20] Have you ever cried over a
girl/boy? -
:: naman!

[21] Last Movie you Watched? -
:: mona lisa

[2 2] What books are you reading? -
:: boy meets girl (ulet)

[23] Piercings? -
:: none

[24] Favorite Movie? -
:: nuknukan ng dami!

[25] Favorite college football Team? -
:: wala

[26] What were you doing before filling
this out? -
:: naglalaba, naglilinis

[27] Any pets?
:: none

[2 8] Dogs or cats? -
:: na

[29] Favorite Flower? -
:: rose?

[30] Have you ever loved someone? -
:: of course.

[31] Who would you like to see right
now? -
:: tatay ko. gusto kong makipagkwentuhan sa kaniya

[33] Do you like to travel by train? -
:: depends

[34] Right-handed or Left-handed? -
:: right

[35] If you could go to any place right
now where would you go? -
:: puerto (ulet) or... Europe (sana)

36] Are you missing someone? -
:: naman!

[37] Do you have a tattoo? -
:: no

[38] Do you still watch cartoons on
Saturday mornings? -
:: not during Saturdays, pag me extra time.

[39] Are you hiding something from
someone? -
:: ewan

[41] what is the wallpaper on your cell
phone? -
:: yung sunrise sa ayala

[42] did you get enough sleep last
night? -
:: of course HINDI!

[44] What do you have handy at your
bedside? -
:: wala...

[45] What makes you unique? -
:: what do you think?

[46 ] Are you afraid of the dark? -
:: minsan...

[ 47 ] Favorite song? -
:: Katinas' songs, parachute band, hillsongs...

[48] What are you afraid of? -
:: tumanda nang mag-isa?

[49 ] Are you a giver or taker? -
:: pareho.

[50] what are your nicknames? -
:: kris, tyn, tyn-tyn, kenkai, kenx (kenks), kai,

random rants

God is definitely good and He is infinitely great!

just a few hours ago, my mind was oozing with ideas and thoughts... now, it's blank.
grrrr... have you experienced this knd of feeling? parang andami-dami mong gustong sabihin, tapos kapag nakaharap ka na sa computer (or perhaps sa taong kakausapin mo, or anything with that kind of nature) biglang "poof" wala lahat yung cool ideas. b-l-a-n-k-o!

this always happens to me - i need to make use of my time wisely and efficiently. si Jesus nga, He spent every moment of His stay on earth worthwhile tapos ako, magpro-procastinate lang.

anyway, i do not know what to write as of this very moment. to be honest i have been thinking of this person the whole night - paano ba naman nagtext kagabi kasi that person found out (from whoever) na nagkasakit ako - but i don't think that writing about that person here would help me...

i am thinking about the upcoming YA 'seminar' this November. i REALLY want to go - pero may apprehension. i have issues regarding my emotions as of the moment - selos, disappointed kasi nag-resign, disappointed kasi nag-offer ka na ng adobo dinedma lang - andami! bahala KA na Lord.

i am praying for kuya Mike. Na patuloy silang i-bless ni God.

i have been reading joshua harris' web, (www.joshuaharris.com) and man, ang cute ng family niya! As in! parang buhay na buhay tuloy yung mga books niyang binabasa ko!


i am logging out. i am going to look for some info regarding parachute band

something valuable

this week taught me something very valuable. I have learned that i need to take things one day at a time.

i was exhausted. for four-straight days, my average sleep only lasts 2-3 hours. i had no time to pray, no time to relax, no time for myself. i "worked" too hard....

the following week - it hit me. i was sick for four days. I WAS PHYSICALLY WASTED.

i think the most important thing that i should take note of what happened is learning learning how to balance my time wisely.

some info about me...

. Your name plus "ly"?
- JABSON-LY

2.Two feelings at the moment?
- tired but happy (also wasted?

3. What are you listening to right now?
- yung tunog ng keyboard...

4. Done anything you regret so far this
week?
- wala pa naman

5. Describe where you are right now?
- maraming computers, onti ng tao

6.The highlight of your week?
- process meeting was a smash, church anniv tomorrow

7. What are you craving to have right
now?
- mangga't bagong

8. Who were the last people you ate
with?
- the kids

9. What are you scared of?
- magalit si Lord sa akin..

10. Last movie you watched?
- sa dvd, nde movie eh "couple or trouble"

11. Last song you sang out loud?
- make me a servant

13. Are you thinking of someone right
now?
- yes

14. Who is the last person you talked
to?
- yung taga-rito sa computer shop

15. Last thing you downloaded on your
computer?
- wala

16. Have you changed much this year?
- siguro (?)

19. Hug or kiss
- warm embrace

23. Who was the last person to text
you?
- tristan

24. Where was the last place you went
besides where you are?
- church

25. Has anyone ever said you looked
like a celeb?
- yep... kamukha ko raw si Angelina Jolie!

26. Do you speak any other language
other than english?
- nope, but i want to learn

27 . watched TV?
- yes, of course

28. Do you dress for style or comfort?
- COMFORT.

tired but happy

i have been deprived of sleep for the last three days...
malabo na nga ang tingin ko sa computer screen while i am writing this entry..

but i wanted to share something.

GOD IS WONDERFUL.
JESUS IS BEAUTIFUL.

i am so touched with the song, "Beautiful"
simple, yet it satisfies the reality that only He can make beautiful things in my life.

To others, life may seem unfair, and cruel at its worst.
But God never said that it'll be easy.
It is a comfort that He is alive and that He is always there.

I am not a perfect person...
nor a strong one (well, i really thought i was a toughie before)
but when Jesus found me
He gave my life a purpose.

I can stand not because I am stong,
I can speak out not because I am wise,
I can buy things not because I am rich,
but it is ALL because of His grace.

I praise You Jesus...
not because of the great things You did for me
but because of who You are.

I laugh because of You
I sing because of You
I teach because of You
I love because of You

I live because of You.

Hope this entry will be an inspiration for you and for myself when I feel down.
Amen

>x((((("> credo <")))))x<

ayokong dumating sa punto na maging routine na lang ang lahat ng gawain ko sa buhay,
ayokong patuloy na lang umagos sa takbo ng mundo...

gusto ko ng isang buhay na well-spent.
gusto ko na ang bawat minuto - bawat segundo ng aking hininga ay makabuluhan - buhay.

hindi ko inaasahan na sa gagawin kong ito - magiging matagumpay ako.
hindi sa lahat ng pagkaataon ako ang nagwawagi.

pero alam ko na sa biyaya ng Dios, kaya ako makakatayo
at magpapatuloy.

iiwanan ko na ang nakaraan.
iiwanan ko na ang mga alaalang hindi naman makakatulong sa aking pagharap sa buhay.
iiwanan ko na rin ang mga pangarap na hindi naman karapat-dapat.

magpapatuloy akong
manampalataya at magtiwala
magmahal at umibig
magsaya at lumuha

LOVE LIKE YOU'VE NEVER BEEN BROKEN