money matters

i joined our team's "paluwagan" and i was really anticipating the day i get my 'sweldo'.

it's not too much but the promise of getting a large sum of money is really exciting! imagine, i get to buy the stuff that i REALLY want. the day drew near - but the euphoria was spoiled by the fact that our account is having some 'problems' and the client wants to 'lower the cost' - which means lowering down the number of people...

the excitement gone, i just went to buy gifts for my inaanaks and friends (which turned out pretty well), but only to find out that almost all of it - gone with the wind!

i have discussed this with a colleague, and we both agreed na ambilis mawala ng pera.

kaya hindi talaga dapat ilagay ang tiwala sa pera - o sa kahit anong bagay o sa kahit sinong tao sa mundo.

kasi, madali silang nawawala.

buti si God, hindi.

i have learned that...

today was a very sad day for me and the whole team i am working with. unexpectedly, we had people who got terminated simply because the "upper-level" said so.

it is unfair. and unprofessional.

there were things i have learned:

1. that you can never trust people, more so the company you are working with, simply because NOTHING and NO ONE IS STABLE. time and time again, i have been reminded of the saying that "Change is the only thing that's constant in this world"

2. that i need not to worry because it will not help me in any way. God simply said to let tomorrow worry for itself...

3. that sincerity works best in silence. whatever words that come out of one's mouth, if not from the heart, you won't feel anything.

4. that people should be cherished, loved and respected the earliest possible time.

5. that you need not wait for the perfect opportunity to say nice things about a person, because that time may never come and it's too late for you to let them know.

6. that the more you know a person, the harder it is to let them go..

7. that good people turns bad... (in situations like this)

8. that most companies think more of money that good and hardworking people that work for them.

9. that no matter how you perform well, it's not enough to satisfy them. all they want you to do and think about is work, work, and work... and if they do not want you, they simply throw you away...

10. that a team won't be the same without Joanne, Vane, Arlene, Jocee, Joel, Bryan, Ian, and Naw. it will never be.

11. that this is not the end...

my heart's desire

Lord,these are my desires - my heart's desires... and i lay them all to you

- maging maayos ang pamilya (spiritually)
- makapagaral na si Jamie at makatapos na siya ng pag-aaral
- magkaroon ng maayos na trabaho si ate
- maayos ang mga gamit sa church
- magkaroon ng YA fellowship sa church (regular) na intimate ang worship ang fellowship with You
- maayos ang mga Hallelujah Kids, na sana wag nilang lagyan ng kulay ang fellowship ng mga bata sa kung anuman na pulitikal na dahilan
- magkaroon ng ka-interfelowship na YA sa AG at buong Pasig
- magkaroon ng laptop
- magkaroon ng bike
- magkaroon ng sariling bahay
- makilala ko na ang God's will ko next year (kasi Lord, gusto ko na po talagang magkapamilya!)

NOT MY WILL, BUT YOUR WILL PO ANG MASUNOD.
amen

no longer a memory

yesterday morning (oct 26) i was having doubts kung tutuloy pa ba ako sa master's commission -- medyo makulimlim kasi (alam mo yun, mas masarap mahiga at manood ng dvd or makinig ng gospel music)... but in all honesty, tinatamad ako. tsaka, nag-iisa lang ako. tapos, wala na talaga akong pera - yung huling P1,000 na lang na naipon ko ang gagastusin ko hanggang sa susunod na sweldo.

pero hindi ko maintindihan - may kurot akong nararamdaman, mahinang kurot pero alam mong "holy kurot"....

let me tell you the story behind the story...

i think it was 2000, or 1999 perhaps when God allowed me to witness a ministry that forever changed my life. that was the first Blueprints Conference, held in BBC when God "introduced" me to this young talented and on-fire Christians (much, much younger than me) dancing under the powerful annointing of the Holy Spirit. Yes, they REALLY have talents (and Praise God for that), but most importantly, the Spirit of the Lord was dwelling in them - ang galing! bawat kumpas ng kamay, bawat bagsak ng paa, bawat ekspresyon sa mukha, ibang klase. ibang-ibang-iba ang pakiramdam ko nun. i know, God was telling me something.

from then on, i decided, kailangang maging part ako ng master's commission. kailangan na makasali ako sa kahit isa sa mga workshops nila at maging part ng isang batch.

but you know what? it never happened. i've meet Christians, who became part of the MC workshops (we even borrowed tapes from them para gawin namin sa church), my cousin who is a missionary in X was also trained by MC, last year duon pa sa church natulog ang ilang grupo ng MC-Olongapo (pero hindi ko alam na me workshop pala!) and that very same event, kasama kami ng mga 'newly graduates' ng MC na magstep-call sa isang daughter church namin (mismo!)

i asked the Lord, "kailan ba darating ang time ko?"

and now this - merong opportunity. the sunday before the workshop, our associate pastor told me na meron daw workshop. FINALLY! the moment i have been waiting for!

tapos, the very morning ng 'conference' bigla akong tinamad. BUT OUR GOD IS A GOD OF PURPOSE. alam kong Siya ang dahilan kaya ako naging part ng 2-day conference na ito.

BLESSED...

then i heard a story of a brother (whom i do not know personally but will forever challenge me) a 16-year old kid named Christian Marasigan who died because of a seemingly innocent accident. his story reminded me of how little time i have... and his story stirred up an overwhelming wake up call. his death proves that compared to eternity, our life here on earth is but short.

BLESSED...

then there's the lesson of the ants - how these little creatures inspired a movement that is shaking and will shake nations... "MISSION SWARMING"

BLESSED...

a revelation of how much we owe our Muslim brothers - an enlightenment... that more to what the news tells about them (labelling them as terrorists, etc), that they are our brothers whom God has blessed, and will bless,

BLESSED...

that more to becoming a part of a team, is becoming a part of an extended family - unseen yet heard of.

BLESSED...
because more to knowing Christ, more to making Him known
is a realization that i am here and i can make a diffence.

amen

50 things you oughta know

1] Whats your middle name?
:: Hernandez

[2] Would you rather get 1,12 or 24
roses? -
:: kahit isa lang basta kulay....

[ 3] How big is your bed? -
:: don't have any

[4] What are you listening to right
now?
:: don't know the song,

[5] What are the last 4 digits in your
cell phone number?
:: 1443

6] What was the last thing you ate? -
:: hotdog at tinapay!

[7] Last person you hugged? -
:: nano

[8] How is the weather right now? -
:: umuulan

[9] Who was the last person you talked
to on the phone? -
:: si Ellarick

[10] What is the first thing you notice
in the opposite sex? -
:: mata, then kuko sa kamay

[11] Favorite types of Food? -
:: Pinoy and Japanese

[12] Do you want children? -
:: naman!

[13] Do you drink? -
:: nope. but sometimes, i want to...

[14 ] Ever get so drunk you don't
remember the entire night? -
:: nope

[ 15] Hair color? -
:: dk brown

[16] Eye color? -
:: dk brown

[17] Do you wear contacts/glasses? -
:: eyeglasses

[18] Favorite holiday? -
:: christmas

[19 ] Favorite season? -
:: rainy season

[20] Have you ever cried over a
girl/boy? -
:: naman!

[21] Last Movie you Watched? -
:: mona lisa

[2 2] What books are you reading? -
:: boy meets girl (ulet)

[23] Piercings? -
:: none

[24] Favorite Movie? -
:: nuknukan ng dami!

[25] Favorite college football Team? -
:: wala

[26] What were you doing before filling
this out? -
:: naglalaba, naglilinis

[27] Any pets?
:: none

[2 8] Dogs or cats? -
:: na

[29] Favorite Flower? -
:: rose?

[30] Have you ever loved someone? -
:: of course.

[31] Who would you like to see right
now? -
:: tatay ko. gusto kong makipagkwentuhan sa kaniya

[33] Do you like to travel by train? -
:: depends

[34] Right-handed or Left-handed? -
:: right

[35] If you could go to any place right
now where would you go? -
:: puerto (ulet) or... Europe (sana)

36] Are you missing someone? -
:: naman!

[37] Do you have a tattoo? -
:: no

[38] Do you still watch cartoons on
Saturday mornings? -
:: not during Saturdays, pag me extra time.

[39] Are you hiding something from
someone? -
:: ewan

[41] what is the wallpaper on your cell
phone? -
:: yung sunrise sa ayala

[42] did you get enough sleep last
night? -
:: of course HINDI!

[44] What do you have handy at your
bedside? -
:: wala...

[45] What makes you unique? -
:: what do you think?

[46 ] Are you afraid of the dark? -
:: minsan...

[ 47 ] Favorite song? -
:: Katinas' songs, parachute band, hillsongs...

[48] What are you afraid of? -
:: tumanda nang mag-isa?

[49 ] Are you a giver or taker? -
:: pareho.

[50] what are your nicknames? -
:: kris, tyn, tyn-tyn, kenkai, kenx (kenks), kai,

random rants

God is definitely good and He is infinitely great!

just a few hours ago, my mind was oozing with ideas and thoughts... now, it's blank.
grrrr... have you experienced this knd of feeling? parang andami-dami mong gustong sabihin, tapos kapag nakaharap ka na sa computer (or perhaps sa taong kakausapin mo, or anything with that kind of nature) biglang "poof" wala lahat yung cool ideas. b-l-a-n-k-o!

this always happens to me - i need to make use of my time wisely and efficiently. si Jesus nga, He spent every moment of His stay on earth worthwhile tapos ako, magpro-procastinate lang.

anyway, i do not know what to write as of this very moment. to be honest i have been thinking of this person the whole night - paano ba naman nagtext kagabi kasi that person found out (from whoever) na nagkasakit ako - but i don't think that writing about that person here would help me...

i am thinking about the upcoming YA 'seminar' this November. i REALLY want to go - pero may apprehension. i have issues regarding my emotions as of the moment - selos, disappointed kasi nag-resign, disappointed kasi nag-offer ka na ng adobo dinedma lang - andami! bahala KA na Lord.

i am praying for kuya Mike. Na patuloy silang i-bless ni God.

i have been reading joshua harris' web, (www.joshuaharris.com) and man, ang cute ng family niya! As in! parang buhay na buhay tuloy yung mga books niyang binabasa ko!


i am logging out. i am going to look for some info regarding parachute band

something valuable

this week taught me something very valuable. I have learned that i need to take things one day at a time.

i was exhausted. for four-straight days, my average sleep only lasts 2-3 hours. i had no time to pray, no time to relax, no time for myself. i "worked" too hard....

the following week - it hit me. i was sick for four days. I WAS PHYSICALLY WASTED.

i think the most important thing that i should take note of what happened is learning learning how to balance my time wisely.